Hazel’s Story

Hazel was a very caring and creative person. She loved to make jewellery and brought her artistic flair to all areas of her life. Her mum, Annie, remembers, “She loved to do DIY and did up her own house so beautifully, and had a Japanese garden that was her happy place. She upcycled stuff from charity shops, painted them, and gave them new life.”

Hazel’s childhood best friend, Dawn, remembers her as the kind of person who lit up a room.

“She was just full of energy, the whole time, even when she got ill—she would uplift anyone’s day.”

But everything changed on Dawn’s 25th birthday.

“I had a phone call from Hazel’s mum, Annie, saying, ‘Hazel’s gone into surgery.’ They’d found a brain tumour. Before that, she’d been fine – just a couple of dizzy spells. I was also due to give birth to my daughter Chantelle – her due date was my birthday. We rushed up to Bristol. I managed to see Hazel before she went into surgery, but while she was in theatre, I went into labour. It was quite a big moment.”

Hazel pulled through. The first thing she did when she came out of hospital was visit Dawn and her new baby – Hazel’s goddaughter.

After treatments lasting about five years, Hazel was cancer-free. She became a carer, wanting to give back. “All her patients loved her because she knew what it was all about,” Annie remembers with pride.

But she still thrived most when she worked as a bartender, Dawn says. “She belonged behind the bar. She just liked to be around people, socialising, hearing about their lives.”

Devastatingly, in 2016, Hazel’s cancer returned. Annie says, “It was in her brain and her spine. So once again, we had to go through all the treatment, all the backwards and forwards to oncology in Bristol. It was a nightmare.

“They operated again, but this time they couldn’t get rid of it – they could just remove some of the mass. They hoped that the chemo and radiotherapy would shrink it enough to give her some more time. And it did – it gave her another four years.

When it became clear that Hazel’s prognosis was terminal, she was referred to St Margaret’s Hospice, who contacted her and asked her if she’d like to come and look around. At first, Hazel was hesitant, fearing what a hospice might be like, but Dawn encouraged her to visit.

Dawn remembers how Hazel’s fears were quickly eased. “She was glad she went. She realised it wasn’t a hospital set-up – it was lovely.”

For some time, Hazel was cared for at home by Caroline from our Community Nursing Team. Knowing that she didn’t have long, Hazel found a new way to give. Dawn says, “She got quite creative, making things for people. She knew her outcome and she wanted to leave something behind. I didn’t know she was into crafts before, but she made something for everyone who meant something to her. I’ve got a few little things, so I’m quite lucky.”

A framed heart made from shells. Hanging button hearts. A frame with their names on it. Dotted around Dawn’s home are photos and memories – small tokens that ensure Hazel is never far away.

Hazel, always selfless and keen to give back, participated in fundraising activities, even after her diagnosis. “While she was still well enough, she hosted a coffee morning to raise funds, and she and I did the Ladies’ Driving Challenge together,” Annie recalls with a smile. “Hazel drove a double-decker bus, a fire engine, and a 48-ton lorry.

But Hazel’s condition started to worsen, and the Community Nurses advised that she needed to be admitted. Hazel arrived on the In-Patient Unit in September 2019, at just 44 years old. “It was just amazing what they did for her,” says Annie. “Her pain was under control, and she had everything she liked to eat. The nurses, Michelle and Cher, would always make her laugh, and they used to sing with her; she’d sing at the top of her voice with them.” The nurses understood that moments of joy, even in the midst of everything, meant so much.

Though it was a difficult time, Dawn also wanted to bring some joy to the hospice in the best way she knew how. “I was always the crazy friend,” she laughs. “So, I thought, I’m going to visit Hazel in my inflatable dinosaur costume. My husband and I drove up to the hospice dressed as a T-Rex and a unicorn. Hazel was like ‘oh my God,’ but she loved it. It uplifted the staff too—we even went into a few other rooms to say hello.

“We had dressed up like that a lot before. Our 30^th birthday was a fancy dress party. So, I wanted to remind her of those days. One day, I visited her in the hospice as Wonder Woman and my husband was Superman. Another day, I went in dressed as Madonna and sang True Blue, which was her favourite. It was about doing silly things—not just for Hazel, but for her mum, her partner, and for me.”

The staff at St Margaret’s made sure Hazel and her loved ones were as comfortable as possible. Dawn says, “They were so friendly, so caring, so understanding. Her mum and partner could stay overnight. Nothing was an issue. She had her own private room, but she could socialise if she wanted. The gardens were beautiful and well-kept. It felt sort of like a holiday retreat.”

Annie’s gratitude for the hospice care extended beyond the nurses and staff to the support she saw from other families. “I witnessed a great deal of kindness when I was here. Not only from staff, but also from other relatives visiting other patients. One lady, when her mother passed away, came in and brought each nurse a present, and she brought me one as well. It was so kind. There was a man who lost his mum, and I happened to be in the corridor when he came out of her room, and he said, ‘I won’t be here when you need a hug, so I’ll give you one now.’”

The support they received from the hospice’s Spiritual Care Coordinator, Ann, was also something Annie will never forget. “Reverend Ann. She was amazing,” Annie says. “On Christmas morning, one of the nurses got up early and she sang Once in Royal David’s City. It was so beautiful. And later, Reverend Ann played the keyboard, and we all sang the Twelve Days of Christmas. Silly things that brought the festive season to such a difficult period. At the time, there was a nurse who would bring in Christmas presents donated by the public for all the patients. And so, ever since then, I’ve brought them in. The ladies at the shop helped me – they’ve been so wonderful.”

Dawn agrees that every aspect of Hazel’s care went above and beyond.

“I remember Ann came into the room after Hazel had passed away, and there were two rosebuds on her pillow. She just said a few words. It was lovely.” Annie and Hazel had a special connection with Reverend Ann; she took Hazel’s funeral.

Annie said that Hazel’s greatest fear was being forgotten. “So, what we decided to do, together with Hazel, was provide some seeds for everybody that came to the funeral,” Annie explains.

Dawn says, “That’s why I started fundraising in Hazel’s memory. To show we’re not forgetting her. She’s still there, and still with me, and still in the hearts of everyone who loved her.”

After Hazel died, her loved ones dedicated themselves to keeping her memory alive.

Dawn’s first fundraising challenge came during the pandemic—a 3.5 million-step fundraiser. “I thought, lovely—I can do that in my own time and get a medal. But I finished it early, so I just kept going. I took it up to 8 million steps for charity.”

Annie, who volunteers in one of the St Margaret’s charity shops, has also been deeply involved in fundraising. “In 2021, just as we were coming out of lockdown, I decided to shave my head for St Margaret’s, sitting in the shop window – I can’t believe I did that! The girl that does my hair agreed – but I think she was more horrified than I was! I thought, ‘people walk about everyday having had chemo,’ so I wasn’t afraid.”

Annie has been volunteering with us for 15 years and plans to continue to do so to show her gratitude for St Margaret’s.

This year, Hazel and Dawn would have celebrated their 50th birthdays together. “That would’ve been a party. I’d have wanted a rave, and she’d have wanted a Madonna disco,” Dawn says with a smile.

To mark the occasion—and to honour five years since Hazel’s passing—Dawn is taking on the London Marathon in her name.

“I just want to enjoy the experience of it. I’m wearing a cape, so I’ve got people’s names on the cape and businesses to sponsor it. I’m not a runner – I only started running 2 or 3 years ago, and I don’t get people that just run for fun. For me, it’s like – why would you run if not for a reason?”

Dawn may not see herself as a runner, but she’s running for Hazel—and for everyone else she’s lost.

She still misses Hazel deeply. “I miss her voice. Her random phone calls. Life would get in the way—we wouldn’t always see each other—but she’d just call to hear my voice. And we’d pick up like no time had passed. No awkward moments. She was like the sister I never had.